The Lens:
My husband was out for the evening last night leaving my son and me on our own. When my son and I have the evening to ourselves, we usually opt to do things my husband wouldn’t want to do.
The two of us began our evening by going to our sushi haunt for dinner. I tried taking my husband there once. He was not enchanted. But, my son and I love it.
For years, our usual form of weekend entertainment has been watching movies at home. We’ve gone through the whole evolution of home movie watching options, starting with Blockbuster Videos (and other video rental companies), then to Netflix DVD rentals and now streaming services. With each new service, our access to movies has grown exponentially.
Probably a bit of digression (as I am prone to) and more info than was needed for this story. The older I get, the more I feel like we need to be cognizant of the evolution of things. Why? I’m not really sure. I just feel that way.
Anyway, my son and I decided to watch “All About My Mother.” Not a movie my husband would have wanted to watch. First, it was a foreign film with subtitles – too much work to watch. And it was old – made in 1999. He would prefer something much newer.
Per IMDb.com, the description goes “Pedro Almodovar’s Oscar-winning comedy (Best Foreign Film, 1999) about a bereaved mother, and overwrought actress, her jealous lover and a pregnant nun.” https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0185125/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0_tt_8_nm_0_q_all%2520about%2520my
Comedy isn’t 100% accurate. It is very funny in parts. But it is also very sad.
It is a bit of a messy movie. There are all of these moving pieces that somehow manage to come together. My son and I would pause the movie every now and then to make sure we understood what was happening.
I liked the movie – worth the watch. But, I walked away with a mix of thoughts. I’m not sure it was a movie with a point, more simply a story to tell. Life isn’t always neat and tidy. Maybe this was a story about the messy.
The Refraction:
I mentioned the evolution of our movie watching habits. I think one important note in our evolution is the movies we would watch. In the Blockbuster days we would go to the video rental store, and, if we didn’t have a specific movie in mind, walk around to see what caught our eye.
We’d go to specific genres – comedy, drama, action. If there was a movie we had heard of, we would take a chance on it. It could be a frustrating experience – trying to pick a movie everyone would want to watch. A lot of discussion (at times, arguing) amid the video aisles.
With the advent of Netflix came a whole new way of choosing movies. I would throw movies in our DVD cue. Everyone had an opportunity to check the cue and move a preferred movie to the top of the list.
I said that with each evolution of our movie watching options, our access to films broadened. What Netflix also did for us was open the door to foreign films. I never once looked in the foreign film aisle at the movie rental store. It just never occurred to me to look there.
And as I said, my husband doesn’t care much for foreign movies due to the subtitles. I get it. It is not quite the same reading dialogue as it is to watch the characters. Still, I have grown to really enjoy foreign films. There are definite differences between American and foreign movies.
You could do an Internet search on the topic – story telling/characters vs. action/special effects. There are a lot of differences.
I think one of the reasons I have taken to foreign films is the actors look more real, like people I might know or see, As such, the movies are more relatable. It is rare when I watch an American film that I think I could know these people. I am talking about the actor, not the character.
A movie that just popped into my head, for reasons which I do not know, is “Sleepless in Seattle.” I love the movie, While I can relate to the story, and the situation, I simply cannot relate to Meg Ryan. She just isn’t like me or anyone I know. (I guess that is just a mere taste of what hordes of people of different ethnicities feel.)
But what really draws me to foreign movies is the stories they tell. They are stories of people, their lives, the dilemmas inherent in living.
Americans like their movies wrapped up nice and tidy with a bow on top. In most of the foreign movies I have seen, the characters’ lives are messy. In “All About My Mother,” they are really messy. While there is a finality to the story, the mess is not cleaned up. There is no sense that the messiness has been resolved. What you do get a sense of, is that the characters will find a way to live amid the mess.
And, there is the draw to foreign movies.
I never thought of my life as a soap opera. But, when I go back and think of the messy in my life, there was a lot. This year, in particular, has been a disaster. Lives are messy.
Messy comes in caring, loving, relating. Messy comes in the working. Messy comes in allowing people into your life, sticking it out through the tough times while at the same time knowing when you need to walk away. If there is no mess in your life, you have no one in your life. There is no living without people. That is existing, not living.