Sr. Mary Clarence in “Sister Act,” when asked about her commitment to “hard work and discipline,” answers “Of course, I’m a nun. Four popes now.” Considering popes typically serve until they die, that’s a lot of popes. Pope John Paul I reigned only 33 days. But, his successor, Pope John Paul II reigned for 27 years.
Presidents are a different story. The longest (at least today) a president can serve is 10 years, as in the case of a president dying in office and the vice president takes over. Typically, though, the president will serve either 4 or 8 years.
By age, let’s say 21, a person would have had at least three presidents, and could have been as many as six. So, even if you are rather young, you would have been exposed to a variety of temperaments in the Oval Office.
I’ve seen quite a few presidents – Democrats and Republicans alike. I have taken for granted what I expect in a president. Regardless of party, here are some of the characteristics I attributed to the holder of the office of the presidency:
- calm
- controlled
- strong
- thoughtful
- concern for all citizens
- a desire to serve our country
- a respect for human dignity
- a willingness to work across the aisle
and more. I saw just about all of these characteristics in every president during my lifetime – with only two exceptions: Richard Nixon and Donald Trump.
I’m not sure if Richard Nixon had any of these qualities, though I think he tried to give the impression he did.
I don’t see any of these qualities in Donald Trump and I don’t think he cares one way or another about giving any impression he does – except for maybe strength but my guess would be because he seems to desperately want to be seen as a strongman.
I’ve read about or heard Trump yelling at journalists, calling people names, dropping f-bombs, destroying food that could have fed starving children, usurping the authority of Congress/governors/mayors yet ceding authority to rich businessmen/dictators/internet influencers, separating families, demanding loyalty from everyone.
So, what’s up? Is he a narcissist? Is he depraved? There are numerous news reports regarding signs of dementia but, how do you gauge dementia with this kind of baseline?
Here’s the thing in all of this – his followers don’t care about any of this. I have said before, I think a whole lot of these people would follow him off a cliff. They are all in.
I have a pretty good idea why the politicians are in it, why businesspeople are in it (not that I agree with it). I am working to understand why American citizens are in it.
Donald Trump is who he is, and always seems to have been. In one article making the case for our president having dementia, he notes how incoherent Trump can be. He states that he was always a jerk but he used to be intelligible.
If you are, let’s say, over 40 and an ardent Trump acolyte, I would like you to consider your views on some things like your thoughts on America in general? How about what democracy is – our way of life, a flexible idea, etc.? Who is entitled to due process? Who are our international allies?
If you look at where you are today, can you say your thoughts are the same as they were 10 years ago?
There are other things you could think about like human dignity, our global obligations, fealty. Has your perspective on any of these things changed?
You could be saying to yourself, I never really thought about these things. If you didn’t before but do now, what changed?
Because something has changed and drastically. Recently I was talking with my husband about the level of hate right now. He reminded me of how much my mother hated Bill Clinton. I said, yes she did. But it was never a source of disenfranchisement between us. Not only could we agree to disagree, but it was all very civil.
There is no such civility today.
Something has changed.
And, it isn’t simply Donald Trump. It is us. We have changed – in our views, in our tolerance of each other.
In the article “Is It Time to Stop Snubbing Your Right-Wing Family?” (https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/13/opinion/family-politics-arguments-right-wing.html), the writer, David Litt, tells of his rocky relationship with his brother-in-law. They didn’t have a lot in common to begin with and it went further south, first due to the pandemic, then his far-right views.
Mr. Litt decided to build a bridge between the two. He states, “No one is required to spend time with people they don’t care for. But those of us who feel an obligation to shun strategically need to ask: What has all this banishing accomplished? It’s not just ineffective. It’s counterproductive.”
Litt also says the two “remain very different, yet we’ve reached what is, in today’s America, a radical conclusion: We don’t always approve of each other’s choices, but we like each other.”
I felt very moved by the effort and result . . . until I read the comments. They were excoriating.
One such comment: “No. People who voted for Trump three times, unless they are now publicly saying ‘My God, this is the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life…how can I atone for this sin’, have proven that while they might be ‘nice’, they are not good people, as they are perfectly fine with fascism, with those whose skin may be a little too dark being rounded up for no reason, with a whole host of vile things MAGA supports. My life is too short to waste time trying to find “small moments in common” with them.”
And, I had to agree – not so much that they aren’t “good people,” but what they support is the antithesis of who we are as a nation, who we should be as members of the human race and is abhorrent – and we shouldn’t ignore that it isn’t ok.
The reason we can’t get along anymore is because It’s no longer about politics. It is about the fundamental values of America, the foundation of our humanity. Something has changed, and drastically. And, it is not good.`